Keep a cone in the trunk of your car. Block a spot for you or a friend whenever you need VIP parking. PRO: you're now the CEO of your block. CON: you might burn in hell.
How to pit a cherry
Two ways we love: Knife or Straw. Either use the dull end of a knife (against the cherry on a cutting board) to force that little pit out of there with some of your own brute strength, or use a wide straw (we prefer BOBA) to poke through and extract. Insert "pop your cherry" joke.
Naughty Hack #13: How to get out of a crowd quickly
Yell: "I'M GONNA PUKE" and start pushing. The crowd will part like the Red Sea. Go Moses, go.
